Seven Indianisms Every Writer Should Avoid

We are like this only, because like this only we will be!

Indianisms are quite common, when it comes to the way most our fellow Indians speak. Most of us can’t help it. Our thoughts are processed in our native language, and we’d translate it to the language we’re trying to speak in. They aren’t correct, but sure as hell are hilarious.

“Basically, myself Kumaran Chandraskeravelu, and I am just passed out of college by having 87% of marks. Yourself also 87%, no?”

Pretty much how I’ve heard quite a few university graduates speak. Let’s try breaking this down.

The Basicallies:

The word “basically” is basically used to stress an important aspect or when you’re trying to make a point. A lot of the time, it ends up being excessively used in most contexts where it really isn’t needed, making it Indianised. I guess, Kumaran just wants us to believe what he’s telling us.

Introduction

I’m sure many, if not all, would’ve gotten calls from credit card companies where the person engaging the conversation begins with “Hello, myself…”. A simple “I’m…” would have the customer intrigued, but a “myself”, makes you want to hang up. Admit it, you’ve even done it too.

Yes, everyone got drunk in college!

“Which year did you pass out of college?”
“Ohh, mostly every other night. But I did graduate sober!”

Wrong place, wrong phrase.

Sometimes, by having a wrong phrase in the wrong context, a new Indianism is created.
“By having styles like Mithun Chakrabothy, I am a disco dancer. Tan tan tana!!”

You and yours and yourself

If myself had a BFF, it would be yourself. I mean it! In any and every context applicable.

…., no? No!

“You will go out on a date with me, no?” Ask her out that way and its definitely going to be a no.
“Question tags, question tags where have you been?” “I got friend-zoned! *hic*”

Yes, you counted right! The title says seven and I’ve only listed six. Don’t worry ya. Its ok.
Be positive. All good will come to those who always be positive. Being positive is what makes you a true Hindustani, no? Yes!

As writers, we definitely do want to sound Indian. Not by the way we write whatever we write, but by our ideologies. Because, this is who we are and this is how we will be!

Disclaimer:

This article is meant for time-pass and comical purposes only. Any resemblance to real persons living or dead is purely coincidental, ok?